Monday, January 28, 2019

Dungeon Vending Machines

All vending machines are sentient. Vending machines are restocked at the start of each session by invisible gremlins. Breaking the glass of a vending machine causes it to attack you with everything it contains, and then fall on you. Spell scrolls are DRM locked, making them twice as difficult to learn for wizards. The first vending machine you find is always SERGEANT TOUGHMUFFINS. Prices adjust depending on a) how much you want the thing and b) how much you have. It can be up to three times as much as what you'd expect outside the dungeon, but not always. More vending machines to come.

(donations only)

Cures injuries but inflicts curses


Feed in gold or items, receive information

Roll on the Character Interestifier, doesn’t accept gold, only weirdness

Divinatory Weapons


  1. Have you considered a vending machine full of Dirt?!

    1. What's the name of their vending machine? Dirty Dealings?

    2. Either "Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap" or if they are in a region with restrictive copyright laws, "Filthy Items at a Reasonable Price"

  2. Visions of BioShock. This pleases.

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